[If you are just joining us, please see Part 1 of this 4-part series.]My “boot camp” trainer surprised me awhile back when she was kind of embarrassed to ask me for my dues. And I kind of got in her face about it. None of us are working for free here. Whether you train or massage or acupunct, you have a living to make and obligations to meet. Money is what allows you to continue to help people. Her arguments back to me were veeerrrry familiar — because they are the same arguments I hear from massage therapists, bodyworkers, and other healing practitioners (you) Ev. Er. Y. Day:
- I’m not a salesman.
- I like to play to my strengths.
- [Army wives] expect stuff for free.
- I don’t want to want it more than “they” do.
Last week we tackled the salesman issue. Today …
I Like to Play to My Strengths
Me too, I said. But, Ms. Physical Trainer Who Yells at Me Lady, if I work at it, I’ll be able to do a push-up. Right? So, taking ownership of money/fee discussions can be your strength when you work at it.
The trainer brushed this off (for the moment) but I thought this was a pretty solid argument. Consider this: What do you do when your client has a bound up, knotty, pinched, guarded pain spot? You know what to do, don’t you? Sure, you all have your own techniques. You go in from this way, you warm up that, you breathe, you Work. Hey, now everyone feels great. You feel strong now. Empowered. Satisfied.
- How did you do that? Practice.
- What did practice give you? Confidence.
I get that this is hard. I get that you are emotionally tied up with your baby (your Work). Rejection — or the possibility of rejection — of your baby wounds you. You dread the look of withdrawal on people’s faces when you tell them your fees. Eventually it gets to the point where you shy away from the possibility of pain. You get bound up, knotty, pinched, and guarded when the subject of your fees comes up. I’m your marketing art practitioner. It’s my job to come in from this way, warm up that, get you to breathe through it, and do my Work. Your job is not to get all bound up, knotty, pinched, and guarded again about how much your work is worth.
So practice. Start here…
Raise your right hand and repeat after me: “I [state your name]* do solemnly swear to stand in front of a mirror every morning and every night for one solid week, look myself boldly in the eye and say — twenty times in a row — ‘I charge [$65] an hour.’ So help me, me.”
The only way you will get strong is through practice. It’s been two weeks and I can finally do a (one. single.) push up that doesn’t completely embarrass me. Get going. I’m gaining on you.
*I know what you said here. 🙂